What to Do With Trump and His Vichy GOP
Following with intense interest the frantic fin de regime antics of President Trump, the conversion of his collaborationist GOP allies and followers from craven moonies to uber-fascists AND the high drama of Mar-a-Lago's torch-and-pitch-fork-wielding peasantry chasing the orange monster away, I have come up with the perfect solution for defusing these crises. All it took was to delve into some obscure French history.
France went through its own wrenching period of divisiveness and governmental dysfunction in the 1930s up to WWII. The Third Republic was a revolving door of weak and incompetent leaders, ultimately succumbing to 95 German divisions. In July 1940, Hitler set up the French State (l'État français), popularly known as the Vichy Regime, headed by WWI hero Marshal Philippe Pétain and Pierre Laval as prime minister. Vichy didn't last long. Two months after D-Day, the Germans evacuated the Vichy leaders and several thousand followers to a small town in southern Germany called Sigmaringen. This became known as the Sigmaringen Enclave. The Germans actually granted it extraterritorial autonomy along with a fancy name: "French Government Commission for the Defense of National Interests." Its 6000 French citizens included 500 soldiers, 700 French SS fighters, prisoners of war, several hundred of the fascist French Militia, French civilian forced laborers and a mish-mash of far-right journalists, artists and assorted misfits. La Délégation française, as it was commonly known, even had its own radio station, Radio Patrie, and two newspapers.
The rump Vichy leadership included Fernand de Brinon as president; Joseph Darnand as chief of internal security (la Milice); Jean Luchaire as propaganda chief; Eugène Bridoux as defense minister; and Marcel Déat as military commander.
Three countries maintained diplomatic missions at Sigmaringen: as you'd expect - Germany, Italy and Japan.
When you think about it, the Sigmaringen Enclave concept was pretty innovative for a totalitarian regime like the Third Reich. It kept the flame of French fascism going until the Allies were pushed back out to sea and up to the Urals. Those self-styled patriots who feared a Bolshevist Europe could hold onto la Cause without the ability to hurt others other than their fellow collaborationists and, unfortunately, some slave laborers. Local Germans were off-limits.
I'm a firm believer that, while history might not repeat itself, it definitely does echo itself. I therefore propose the following:
to defuse the prospect of a coup d'etat by a cornered failed president, Congress authorize the establishment of an "American Government Commission for the Defense of National Interests (AGCDNI)" at the U.S. Naval Base at Guantanamo, Cuba - where we have enjoyed extraterritorial status for well over a century.
The executive mansion would be called "Jefferson Davis House."
the "American Delegation" be given its own flag (I suggest Old Glory with the fasces replacing the 50 stars).
Trump would, of course, be president - the office he's been refusing to give up.
Pence would continue on as VP.
Stephen Miller would be internal security chief.
Steve Bannon would be in charge of ideology & propaganda.
Michael Flynn would be both defense secretary and military chief.
the so-called American "militias" would constitute the regime's defense force.
Kayleigh McInerney would stay on as regime spokeswoman.
Sidney Powell would be attorney general.
Rudolph Giuliani would be mayor of GTMO Enclave.
Scott Atlas would be secretary of health and racial purity.
the Trump kids would run the "economy."
leftover Confederate dollars would be used as the national currency.
Fox News, One America, Newsmax and other ultra-fringe media would relocate to GTMO.
Melania would be ex officio advisor on cosmetic surgery (with Ivana as deputy).
Just as Vichy had its far right "Révolution nationale" ideological manifest, the AGCDNI would formally adopt whatever QAnon says.
Foreign embassies would include Russia and...well, just Russia - to start with.
Trumpist congressional collaborators (les collaborateurs congressionnels trumpistes) from Mitch McConnell to Rand Paul to Ron Johnson and the rest of the Rabid Right Trump Caucus would quit the U.S. Congress and become members of the GTMO Enclave Congress where they could indulge in conspiracy theories till the iguanas come home with no fallout for the American people.
So, this is my proposed blueprint for offshoring our nation's hardcore revanchist American politicians and their fanatical fan club of blood and soil followers. Not only would it defuse a very fraught political situation, but it would allow the Biden administration to get off to a smooth start in Making America Normal Again.
One sticky detail: the political careers of Vichy's Laval, Brinon, Luchaire, Bridoux and others ended abruptly before a firing squad in 1945. And Pétain, tried for treason and sentenced to life in prison, was exiled to a tiny island off the French coast where he died ignominiously at age 95.
See also:
Vichy Republicans and the New McCarthyism: Trump's Witch Hunt Against the FBI